How to have the confidence to choose the wedding cake (and wedding!) you really want by Charlene Russell, Terre et Lune Cake Design

The first time I let go of my inhibitions and made a wedding cake that would eventually embody my signature style, it was exciting and nerve wracking, as I feared it might just be ‘too much’ for my prospective clients. I was stepping away from the more mainstream wedding cake designs and moving towards something more unique and more me.

What I didn’t count on however, was the overwhelmingly positive reaction that I received. Whilst I was diluting my creativity to try and be like every other cake designer, there were couples out there who were looking for something more niche. I had made the mistake of presuming what couples wanted and followed the crowd…how wrong I was.

That said, I do understand that it can be difficult in some circumstances to go your own way and do something different from the ‘norm’. So, if you’re a couple that really wants to inject your unique personalities into your wedding, how do you find the confidence to do it?

Ditch tradition

Whilst the landscape of weddings has changed significantly, there’s still a certain expectation of what a wedding should traditionally look like. From my own experience in speaking to couples, it does seem to stem somewhat from what their parents and grandparents experienced when they got married.

It's very easy to be influenced by other people’s own vision of what they think your wedding should look like and their references from a long time ago and when it comes to wedding cakes, they’re usually white and made of fruit cake! Yes, it’s a delicate issue and you don’t want to upset anyone but setting boundaries from the outset will prevent you from ending up with a wedding that belongs to someone else’s vision and not yours.

Cake by Terre et Lune Cake Design. Photograph by Zaki Charles Photography

Focus on yourselves

If you feel overwhelmed by others’ opinions, then try to block out the noise and bring it back to you as a couple. Your wedding is about celebrating you after all. Focus on the styles that you like because there’s absolutely no point in opting for something that doesn’t feel right. If you’re not into fussy detail and you adore the sleek and modern look, then a highly decorated cake with ruffles and intricate piping isn’t going to float your boat or represent you in the right way.

A good way of managing this is to avoid inviting too many opinions into the planning process. In the past, I’ve experienced couples attend their wedding cake consultation with their parents and future in-laws and, whilst it’s lovely to involve them, everyone has a different opinion on style, flavour and taste and it causes a lot of stress, and the couple sometimes ends up compromising with something that’s safe but not necessarily them. If you’ve seen any episodes of ‘Say Yes to the Dress’ then you’ll know that an entourage isn’t always entirely helpful!

 Call time out on ‘timeless’!

There’s a lot of talk about creating a timeless wedding but what does that really mean? 

What we consider timeless now is a far cry from what was considered timeless 20 years ago. Trends don’t transcend time and yes, fashions will come, go, and come back round again and we will feel some nostalgia for those trends. I mean, I’ve even seen wedding cakes with pillars make a comeback! 

Trying to achieve ‘timeless’ (or should I say ‘classic’ or ‘conventional’?) may just mean that you strip away any personality and create a wedding that looks like many others. If you want to inject something of yourselves then just embrace what you love right now and when you do look back on your wedding in 20 years’ time, it will be with fondness of the era in which you got married. 

Cake by Terre et Lune Cake Deign . Photograph by Poppy Carter Portraits

Look for inspiration outside of weddings

Whilst you are absolutely going to look at other weddings for inspiration when planning your own, there’s something to be said for looking outside the realm of weddings for ideas. By doing so, you remove the emphasis on weddings and move the focus back to YOU and your styles.

So, why not look to the things you like and enjoy in everyday life? What kind of clothes do you wear? What’s your home like? What are your hobbies? Do you love the city or the countryside? Do you love art and if so, what style? 

As a cake designer, this kind of information gives me a better idea of your personalities and if you also let me know how you want your wedding to feel, I’m more able to propose a design that fits perfectly and uniquely to you and your wedding.

Cake by Terre et Lune Cake Design. Photograph by Suzy Elizabeth Photography

Trust your supplier

I’ve lost count of the times a couple has come to me with a set idea on their wedding cake design because it was all they had seen on their internet searches. While the internet is a brilliant resource, it tends to run on algorithms and high-ranking keyword searches, which is great for finding out what’s mainstream, but not necessarily good for exploring what’s niche and unique.

Let’s take ‘rustic wedding cakes’ for example. Do a search and you’ll be met with a sea of semi-naked buttercream cakes, and you’d be forgiven for thinking that’s the only possible style you can have because that’s all you can see. And why wouldn’t you? You’ve probably never planned a wedding before and if this is what goes then why argue? 

If you absolutely love the look of a semi-naked cake then go for it, but if you’re only choosing this style because you think that’s what you should have, or you just can’t think of any other style then don’t be tempted to compromise. The beauty of bespoke products like wedding cakes is that you can have anything you want and if you don’t know what that is then here’s where your supplier comes in. Wedding suppliers are a creative bunch so look to them to inspire you design something unique for you. 

Above all, own it!

Have conviction in your own choices. If you love it then go for it and if that’s a bold or dramatic wedding cake for example, then so be it. Don’t worry what people will think or how it might not stand the test of fashion trends over time. Live in the moment and embrace your wedding day for what it is and means to you TODAY. This comes from a bride who wore ivory cowboy boots, danced the night away in absolute comfort and has never regretted it since!

Cake by Terre et Lune Cake Design. Photograph by MT Studio Weddings

About Terre et Lune Cake Design

Charlene Russell, the face behind Terre et Lune Cake Design, creates luxury bespoke wedding cakes for the creatively adventurous.  

Located on the leafy Buckinghamshire/Oxfordshire border, Charlene is passionate about the art of cake and delivering on exceptional flavour. Her speciality lies in handpainted watercolour cakes and hand-crafted wafer paper flowers, combining cake artistry with thoughtful design to produce distinctive and elegant centrepieces that are uniquely made for you.

Charlene Russel of Terre et Lune Cake Design.

enquiries@terreetlunecakedesign.co.uk            

07518 800529

www.terreetlunecakedesign.co.uk

Instagram & Pinterest:  @terreetlunecakedesign

A huge thank you to Charlene for writing this inspiring blog giving Love & Loved brides the reassurance and confidence to have the wedding you want.